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The Housemartins once wrote an album titled Hull 4 London 0. But with the likes of Arsenal, Chelsea, Spurs, West Ham and even Fulham to play next season it´s time to touch up those figures.

Make that Hull 4 London 44.

Manager Phil Brown is being feted for steering the Tigers to the Premiership. Rightly so.

The club has waited 104 years to play in the big boys league and Brown has masterminded their route in just 18 months. It´s hard to believe they only avoided relegation to Championship One by a solitary point last term.

But it will be a very brief visit to the Premiership for the orange-faced boss who is half man half Oompa Lumpa. Hull managed to lose 13 matches …

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Amusing to hear Michael Vaughan label England´s Test win over New Zealand as a "special victory". Yeah right. About as special as Gulliver emerging as MVP in a Lilliputt basketball competition.

New Zealand are pony, everyone realises that except the smirking Vaughan and his cronies. The very fact that someone as limited as Vaughan has held onto the captaincy, let alone his position in the batting order, is a decent guide as to the state of English cricket.

In betting terms the England skipper is known as a “flat-track bully”. The type of player who roughs up inferior opposition but is nowhere to be seen when the big boys come out to play.

A six-wicket haul from Monty Panesar and a century …

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For months earlier this year it was all about Jonny and Danny. Correction: Jonny or Danny. Who should play for England at fly-half, the famous No.10 position? Jonny Wilkinson or Danny Cipriani? For a while it was Jonny, in the end it was Danny, and in the end he was quite brilliant. But we’re asking a different question now, as England face summer tests against the Barbarians and then a double-header against New Zealand. It’s not Jonny or Danny anymore. It’s who else?

Because Jonny is injured again. We’re not sure what’s wrong this time; he’s always knackered these days. It could be his back, or his neck, or his toes, or his nose, or his eyelash. And Danny – poor …

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