Has Fulham boss Roy Hodgson been on the methylated spirits? Has owner Mohammed Al Fayed switched the water supply in the changing rooms to Krug champagne? They are the only rational kinds of explanation for Hodgson´s comments that Jari Litmanen can play a big role in the club´s league survival.
For those who don´t know, ageing Jari qualifies for a heating allowance next Christmas and his last top flight goal came against Woolwich Arsenal in 1897. So why on earth does Hodgson believe the Finn´s creaking bones can fire the Cottagers to safety?
That bloke in the dinghy who fishes the footballs out of the Thames will have more of an influence on the team´s form …
